A Little Boy Walking Through The Graveyard
by Roxanne Morinaka
Summary: AU- Who says things were any better before he got to the Abbey? (Kai maybe KaiXTala later)
1. And How Many More Have To Die?

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the OC's, not that they are worth much.

A Little Boy Walking Through The Graveyard

Chapter 1 And How Many More Have To Die?

God was dead.

That was the only explanation for all his prayers going unanswered.

He sat in his little black suit waiting for the funeral to begin. The other guest darted sympathetic looks at him, waiting until they had his attention giving the appropriate wordless condolences and then turning to gossip with their friends.

He began to swing his legs and look further down the church, they thought that he didn't understand. That the idea of death was beyond his intelligence. He hated that as he had seen enough death to understand it very plainly.

He scanned the crowd for his father. His father had left him twenty minutes ago saying that he would be right back. He had only been in his fathers care for three days and this had already happened eight times.

His father had brought his new wife along and she was treating it like a social event, greeting people and smiling in he best dress. Kai didn't know much about funerals but even he thought it was in bad taste that she could be dancing so openly on his mothers' grave.

His father hadn't seemed to notice. His father never noticed anything, his two year old sister was currently washing her hands in the holy water right in front of his father and still nothing.

Kai stood up and walked towards her picking her up and walking back to his seat. He would still have to look after her now he realised sadly and for a moment he wished that his father would die too. He checked that thought almost instantly , he was beginning to think that wishing people dead actually worked and he would not risk loosing anyone else.

Keiko fidgeted in his lap and turned around offering him a cute little smile and twirling a some hair around her finger. She did not know what was happening, she didn't seem to understand that they would never see their mother again. She still looked for her whenever they went anywhere and cried for her at night.

Kai felt sorry for her and hoped that in time they would forget, though he knew it would never happen. Kei's death still hurt him and that had been before Keiko was born. She was all he had left.

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Kai stood with his launcher ready under the watchful eyes of his grandfather. He wanted to impress the man, he wanted to finally beat Kei at something, anything.

He had a good strong launch for his first attempt, but Kei's was better. They fought, but Kei had won.

Their grandfather had given Kei sweets for being the winner, he told him that one day he would have him enrolled in a special school just for Beyblading if he just practised and tried as hard as he could.

He told Kai that it was a good try.

Kai hated Kei, he would always be second best as long as he was around. He wished that Kei would just die.

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Six year old Kai stood in his new black suit as his relatives passed him by. Some whispered about the death saying how hard it must be on the mother, that she should suffer such a loss at such a time. Others had said nothing and didn't make eye contact.

They were all treating him like a ghost and as much as he tried to ignore them it still hurt.

He started searching the crowd for his mother and father, though he knew that they weren't much better and that it was only painful for them to look at him.

He knew this because they had told him. They had said a lot of things when Kei had died and none of them had made him feel any better.

He saw that they were talking to the priest and began to make his way over there. But the closer he got the more he heard and soon he couldn't move at all.

"I Don't want him near me!" his mother cried angrily.

"He is your son and you will look after him." His father argued "Isn't it enough for you that you killed one of them? Do you want to kill another?"

"I did not kill him!" She screamed "If you had been home more instead of with that whore then I would have had enough time to notice that there was something wrong."

"I was working! And how hard is it to take care of two six year old boys?"

"Don't start ok just don't …I can't believe…well there is only one now and you can have him!"

The Priest spotted him. "I know that this must be very hard for you" he said trying to defuse the situation "But I must insist that you refrain from talking about the child like some unwanted pet. Please take a moment to think about the child's feelings he has just lost a part of himself."

"Father with all due respect shut up", said his father to the Priest . "This child is a monster all he does is cry and shout. He doesn't care that his brothers dead, he doesn't care about how hard we've both taken it. All he wants is attention, all the time.  
"His brother was so good and quiet…what is this little shit other than annoying?"

Throughout this his mother had been agreeing. She knew that this had to be someone's fault and it was not her own. Kei had been a good boy, Kai wasn't. Kai should have died it was as simple as that.

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Kai tried not to move too much as he took the sheet of paper being offered to him. Keiko had fallen asleep and he did not wish to wake her even though both his legs had fallen asleep and he needed to go to the bathroom.

The piece of paper had a picture of his mother on it with a poem. The new wife had spent allot of time making it so that people would remember it, talking for hours with printers and choosing colours. She had used a poem by some one called Emily Dickenson to convey her hurt at loosing such a good friend off whom she'd stolen her husband and who she'd never really met.

Kai was briefly angry for what it was worth, for all the good it did.

He wondered if Emily Dickenson was related to the Mr Dickeson from TV.

'Parting is all we know of heaven, and all we need of hell.'

Hell.

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Kai walked into the dimly lit room. It was late afternoon in early July but all of the curtains had been pulled letting only streaks of light piece the darkness at intervals.

The room was stuffy and smelled slightly stale, he was holding a new Beyblade too afraid to use it in the house but not willing to put it down where it could be taken or lost.

He had called her twice already his voice echoing through the silence in the house. The thought that she might still be asleep worried him, he didn't want to have to wake her. But she was due to pick Keiko up from playgroup soon and would be even angrier if she was late again.

"Mum?" he whispered trying to make his way through the dark room and bumping into furniture as he went. "Mum?" he asked again, becoming a little frightened.

Usually she would have yelled at him by now, told him to shut up, that he was pathetic and useless. Usually he would have heard things banging as she tried to wake herself up and get ready. Usually she would have moved, coughed or even spoken by now.

It he had made her ill she would have told him and that was the only time she was really this silent. Even when unconscious she would make heavy snoring sounds that let him know she was ok.

He couldn't resist the small amount of hope that began growing in him, it started at the pit of him stomach and worked it's way up to his brain warming him as it did. He wanted her to be dead and away where she could never shout at him or his sister again.

He swallowed the thoughts and crushed them deep inside. That was wrong, he loved his mother.

That was when he found the body,

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The priest was speaking in hushed tones trying to hold the funeral party's interest by not making too many obscure bible references and not making too many mentions of what the woman was really like.

The casket was open before him and they had done a good job of changing the look on her face to one of serenity. She looked like wax dressed, of course, to the step mothers tastes, primped to look ten times more attractive then she did in life.

Kai barely recognised her and Keiko not at all.

She looked happy and content like Kei had though he had been bald and much smaller.

Death didn't seem that bad Kai had to admit, it only really seemed to hurt those that carried on living.

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It was dark in the hospital and quiet. It was much scarier there at night and Kai wished that they hadn't left him alone.

The nurse who had been taking care of him had been called away and his parents had left with one of the doctors to have what they called a 'serious adult conversation'.

Kai had observed over the last few weeks that a 'serious adult conversation' meant shouting and if that was the case he didn't want to be involved.

He had located Kei's room with no more difficulty than usual as now it was like his second home as well.

Last time Kai had seen Kei he had told him he was dying. It had made Kai laugh, he had told Kei that he was silly and that he was too young to die. That only old people died and bad people from TV. 

This had been before he had heard the 'serious adult conversation' between his parents as he lay in bed pretending to be asleep.

The room was small, Kei's bed and monitors took up most of it. Kai walked up to the bed and climbed in next to his brother.

They lay face to face. It had always been strange for Kai to do that with Kei as it felt like looking in the mirror, even stranger now that Kei was so thin, pale and bald.

Kai wondered if that was what happened to everyone when they were dying…if it would happen to him.

He had asked the nurse if when Kei died he would die too. She had laughed. She had not seen Kei before he had got sick and she had not known they were twins. She had made him feel stupid and so he hadn't asked any questions again.

He fell asleep there next to Kei in his hospital bed and when he ha woken up Kei was dead.

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The eulogies were beautiful lies. Everyone was quick to say what a saint she had been and almost completely omitted the fact that she had put an end to her own life. The ugliness of suicide was not fit to be mentioned around such beautiful flowers and gorgeous oak coffins.

They had even put her in a long sleeved dress to hide the track marks on her arms and gashes across her wrists.

It fitted her well and was pinned close to her neck to hide the bruises still not faded from weeks before.

She had always been fragile.

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Glass was thrown against the wall and voices were raised. Kai was hiding under the table, he knew better than to get involved again. She was screaming and so was he. Keiko was at the neighbours place playing happy with her friend Jane. Kai wished he was out, wished he had friends. But he didn't play well with others.

He could see ankles striding around the kitchen and smashing things. They were women's ankles. They were his mothers ankles. He saw thick boots chase her sometimes tripping in the mess, sometimes treading in it.

He heard a loud thud and then his mother was lying on the ground, she still hadn't noticed him yet, but she looked distracted. Then he saw hands grasp her throat. She was making funny noises; choking and gasping , he hands grasping and her eyes rolling back into her head.

He knew that it was stupid before he even did it, but for some reason he did it anyway. He jumped up and started pulling the man who he was now expected to call his fathers hair. He bit and scratched the man until he let go of his mothers neck.

He then received his punishment happy in the knowledge that he ha saved his mothers life.

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His step mothers eulogy was a beautiful mix of Native American and Mexican funeral rights, finished off with a Russian prayer and delivered between heart raking sobs that were almost believable. She pledged to look after the children left behind as though they were her own and claimed that it was what the deceased would have wanted.

Keiko had fallen asleep again by that time and was snoring quietly by his side. Kai was trying hard to pay attention knowing for some reason that this was important but he soon found himself drifting off as well. He hadn't slept properly in days, he couldn't. He missed his old room and toys. His new house smelled funny.

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"Welcome to your new room!" his step mother shouted with false enthusiasm throwing her hands into the air. She had been showing him around his new home for nearly an hour and he wanted was to go to sleep, he had spent the entire night at the police station.

"I think we should put him straight to bed." Interjected his father pointing at his yawning son.

"Fine." she whispered "You tuck him in." She stepped away from them and leaned against the wall.

The room had been decorated in a hurry and was far too young for him with brightly coloured clown posters and mobile hanging from the ceiling.

"Lets' get you to bed." Said his Dad uncomfortably nudging him along "Want a bed time story?"

Kai shook his head, he just wanted to sleep.

Kai changed his clothes and slipped beneath the foreign covers. They were cold and they smelled funny. He could hear his father and step mother arguing quietly. Ending as his father said "For Christ's sake Nataliya his mothers just killed herself!"

"Well that just means that I'm stuck with him, not that I have to be happy about it!" she shouted slamming the door behind her.

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Kai was woken up by his step mothers hand gripping his shoulder and shaking him.

"Wake up my little angel the service is over" and then to someone else he heard her say "Poor little tyke it's all been too much for him. Well at least he has a good mother now…"

He opened his eyes and stopped. "Look dear Mrs Khasinou has offered to take you and Keiko to the wake while your father and I clean up here. You'll be a good boy won't you and look after your sister?"

Kai nodded clutching Keiko closer causing her to struggle slightly in her sleep.

"Good." She beamed giving the thumbs up to somebody across the room.

She looked at him again and then started to walk away "Bloody little shit hasn't said a word since his mother died." She complained.

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Kai sat silently at the police station. After he had found the body he hadn't screamed or cried he had just gone to the phone like he had so many times before and called the police.

"My mother is not moving." He'd said, "I think that I need an ambulance."

The police had asked his name, age and address then sorted out the rest themselves.

When they had rung the door bell he had calmly led them through the house to the body and watched as they checked her pulse and pronounced her dead.

H wasn't shocked at this and just sat there waiting for them to remember him.

They asked him where his father was he had told them that his step father was in jail. They had asked him where his father was "With his new wife." Did he have the address? "Yes I'll get it," Did he have anymore brothers and sisters? "Yes, Keiko" And where was she? "Playgroup. Shady Hills class 4B".

After that they had not asked him anything else and he had not spoken since. His father was over four hours late picking him up from the police station. He wondered what they had done to Keiko.

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He stood in the door way watching his mother. She had not talked to him since she had gotten back from the hospital. She seemed to be in a good mood, she as singing,

"Oh Kai come in." she called her voice soft and slightly drowsy. She rocked back and forth holding a bundle in her arms. "You can forgive yourself now, for killing Kei. I know you don't mean to be bad…but look."

Kai looked down at the small pink child confused. She had not shown him the baby before.

"This is Keiko. Look Kai God in all his wisdom and mercy has given Kei back to us."

Kai was frightened, they were a catholic family they did not believe in reincarnation.

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"No Keiko stop that's not how Kei would have done it, come here!" His mother chased the toddler Keiko around the room. She did not eat like Keiko, or talk like him either. She was good at none of the things that Kei was good at and even liked different things.

Keiko cried as their mother spanked her.

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Kai and Keiko sat ridged in the back of Mrs Khasinou's car frightened by the woman's erratic driving.

"They say that your grandfather is going to be at the wake, Isn't that exciting? He is a great man. A rich one too, be sure to stay on his good graces." She prattled on swerving out the way of a truck. "My nephew Boris works for him, says the man is a saint. He'll soon get you talking I'll bet."

End of Part One 


	2. And You Can't Hurt Me Anymore

Warning: disturbing and violent.

Disclaimer: I don't own Kai and considering what I seem to put him through I think we should all be glad about that.

Thank you for the reviews.

Chapter 2 - And You Can't Hurt Me Anymore

Kai regained consciousness at twelve thirty-two on a Friday. He had tried to roll over and found that he couldn't move. He attempted to lift each arm and leg individually and began to panic when he realised that he could not. Realising that he had been trying all this in darkness he attempted to open his eyes. They too would not obey him and soon he was close to hyperventilating.

His lids felt too heavy and seemed stick together. The last substance that he remembered being so sticky had been the blood. Blood. All he could remember now was the blood and his raspy cracked throat tried to scream. He nearly choked as his lips refused to move.

He was like a horrible dream and his body just would not wake up. Maybe he would be stuck like this forever. A prisoner inside himself. Maybe he was dead.

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Kai shook his mother trying not to scream. He knew that she was alive she had been moving just a moment ago. A looked left and right for his step-father. He wanted to call the man, he needed help. But he was sure that if he even opened his mouth he would scream.

"Shut that little bitch up she's crying," ordered his step-father walking into the room idly holding a fresh bottle of the foul smelling brown stuff he always drank.

Kai wasn't sure if that man was talking to him or his mother. So instead of attempting to answer, and still not sure that he could, he continued to shake his mother. She looked so horrific with all that white liquid coming from her mouth.

"Shit! Move!" shouted his step-father when he finally spotted the pair. He threw himself on the floor and checked his wife's pulse.

Kai ran over to the cordless phone and brought it to his step-father. He was too scared to remember why he had been avoiding the man now, especially when his mothers life seemed to depend on it.

"What's that for?" asked his step-father angrily knocking the phone out of Kai's hand.

"Am…Ambulance," Kai managed to stutter out, bending to pick up the phone and offer it to his step-father again.

"You stupid shit they would call the police! Is that what you want? To have no mother or father? You and Keiko to end up living on the street?"

Kai dropped the phone shamefully and watched as his step-father performed a strange version of CPR beating at his mothers chest with his fists and blowing into her mouth with the puffed out cheeks of a blowfish.

Kai's mother made a choking sound and sat up so quickly that she crashed heads with her husband. She looked at them dazedly before turning quickly and vomiting on the floor.

"Shit," muttered his step-father laughing slightly and rubbing his head. "See no need for an ambulance."

Kai watched as his mother vomited and cried and his step-father poured himself a drink and felt numb. She had been alive and dead at the same time.

In the next room Keiko was still crying.

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When Kai woke again at one thirty-six the next day. This time his eyes opened automatically and were greeted by the view of a large white unfamiliar ceiling. He could feel the hard crust in the corner of his eye sockets and tried to lift one of his hands to rub it away. It was painful but he managed to move his arm startled slightly by the feeling of the blood inside him rush into it.

After rubbing his eyes until they hurt he blinked and stared back up at the ceiling. He had no idea where he was.

A loud beep from behind him made him jump. It was a machine. A hospital machine like the ones that they had hooked Kei up too…he was in the hospital…the beeping of the machines, the needle in his arm…

He began to panic, the beeps getting closer together and making his head ache.

The hospital. He was in the hospital. Like Kei had been when he was dying…when he had died…what was he doing in the hospital?

His breathing was heavy and loud. He pulled his arm up quickly wincing at the pain and began to run it frantically one his head.

He still had his hair. He still had his hair. It calmed him a bit. He still had his hair. His breathing began to even out a little. He still had his hair…

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Kei cried silently.

One hand gripped the bathroom sink, the other his hair brush. Both grips were white knuckle.

Kai stood on his tip toes and looked down. The kitchen sink was littered with hair.

Kei's anguish could be seen in his hunched shoulders, with the way his whole body shook with his sobs…

Kai felt guilty that all he could do was stand in the door way and watch. He didn't know what was happening. Kei had said that he was fine. He raised his own hand towards his hair and ran his fingers through it checking for bald patches.

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Kai had managed to get himself into a sitting position by the time the nurse had come to check on him. She had smiled made some small talk and then gone to find the doctor.

It was another few minutes before the doctor came walking into the room. His smile felt fake. "I'm glad to see that you have finally woken up."

Kai nodded and watched the doctor wearily. He was learning that all adults were trouble.

"So how do you feel…Kai?" asked the doctor picking up the chart from the end of the bed and reading.

"My legs won't move and my arms feel like bean bags," croaked Kai turning his gaze to the ceiling.

"Well you see sometimes when people get hurt they need to take special medicine that helps them heal…" started the doctor and Kai stopped listening. He was not five years old after all.

"Where's Keiko? Is she ok?" Kai interrupted suddenly remembering that she had been in trouble but not remembering why.

"Your sister is fine Kai, you should worry more about yourself. Your father tells me that you have been through quite an ordeal."

"My father?" asked Kai, "Where is my father?"

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Kai crept quietly into the living room hoping that everybody was already in bed. Keiko had left her favourite doll by the fire. She had been told off about it and couldn't sleep knowing it was down there.

It was quite far past his bedtime and he didn't want to get caught. He had never misbehaved in his fathers house before. He'd seen him fight with his mother and knew the man could raise a fist when needed.

He found the doll where he knew she'd left all he had to do was get upstairs with it.

"Kai?"

it was his fathers voice. Kai's heart sank and hit the floor, his father had been sitting in his chair the whole time. He wondered why his father had been sitting in the dark.

"Kai what re you doing down here? Ss'past your bedtime."

Kai froze and braced himself for a hit that didn't come.

"S'right I forgot that you didn't talk," continued his father, more to himself than Kai. He was holding a half empty glass filled with the foul smelling liquid his step-father had always drank.

"You're not like your mother. She never shut up." Kai's father sat forward on his chair staring almost straight through him. "You look like her though…same face." His father raised a hand and placed on his cheek. "Same pretty face."

Kai flinched a little , he wasn't used to tender touches.

"Your mother was a whore," his father muttered taking his hand away and knocking back the remaining contents of his glass. "She knew how to handle men…she handled me real good…"

Kai switched to hold the doll in the other hand nervously. His father was scaring him.

"Give me your hand boy," his father ordered suddenly putting his bottle back down after pouring another glass.

Kai hesitated. He wanted to run.

"Give me your hand." his father ordered again the softness gone from his voice.

Kai stepped a little closer and held out his arm closing his eyes as he did.

"I'll tell you a secret" he heard his dad say, he'd never heard his dad's voice so close before. "The way to control men…the only way a woman can use so you have to guard against it…"

Kai felt his hand being placed on something rough and hot and hard. His eyes flew open and he saw that his hand was on the crotch of his fathers trousers. He pulled his hand back roughly stumbling slightly, his eyes wide.

"Don't look at me like that!" his father shouted "Don't stare at me like that with your brothers eyes. You're not like him…you're like her…you're a whore like her…just get upstairs and go to bed! Don't let me find you out of bed again!"

Kai could hear his father shouting as he ran out of the door. He had dropped the doll but he would not go back for it.

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The doctor had done some tests and asked some questions. Telling him in a fake gentle voice that when he was feeling a little better the police wanted to have a word with him. Kai had nodded all he wanted was for the doctor to leave.

It was over an hour before he heard the commotion in the hall. The voice was familiar and after a moment he realised that it was his step mums. She must have been shouting because he could hear some of what she said quite clearly. The words "cursed" and "murderer" almost screamed so loud they shook the room.

He did not take any of what she said personally. He couldn't quite remember what he had done but he knew that it had been terrible.

Any she was pregnant and he knew that pregnant women could get quite emotional.

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"I hate you…you little bastard…you little…this new child will be nothing like you or your no good of an arse of a father! I wish that you had never been born. I wish that…Kei…I wish that you would have died instead. Why are you looking at me like that? Why can't you just die you useless, worthless worm! Eating up all of my money…your step-father tells me that you have been drinking my whiskey. You're no good you never were you…"

Kai sat at the kitchen table eating some cereal. It was a little old but it was all they had until his fathers check came through. His mother was in a bad mood, his step-father had said that it was because she was pregnant. He said that pregnant women got very emotional.

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Kai stared up at the police men sacredly. His mother and step-father had always told that the police were evil.

"My name is Captain Atwood." the largest man said, "your doctor tells us that you don't seem to remember what happened…"

Kai looked at them strangely "What happened?" he asked.

"When your step-father visited last week."

"Last week?"

"The day after your sisters birthday."

"I…"

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The door bell had been ringing for about five minutes and still his step-mother had not come down to answer it. She was probably asleep.

Kai pulled himself off the sofa throwing one last longing glance at his favourite cartoon and went to the door. He was missing his program…it had better be important.

"Hello Kai. How are you my boy?"

Kai froze.

"Can I come in? they let me out this morning and I came to see my little girl."

Kai tried to close the door but his step-father was fast and too strong.

"Now come on Kai…I just came to say hello my little girl. Be nice I just lost my wife."

Kai backed away as his step-father entered and hit the wall with a soft thud.

"Kai who's at the door?" his step-mother shouted from upstairs. Kai didn't answer. "Listen you little retard you're going to have to talk sometime or me and your father are going to have to send you to a special school!"

His step-father smiled and began to walk towards the stairs. This time Kai didn't freeze. He ran in front of his step-father and started shaking his head.

"I missed you kid," laughed his step-father ruffling his hair and turning towards the kitchen.

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The police captain looked at Kai intently as he began to tell the story of what he had just remembered..

"And did your step-mother know that there was somebody else in the house?" he asked when Kai paused.

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Kai was standing in the kitchen door way when his step-mother came storming in her belly swollen with her pregnancy.

"Kai why didn't you…who's that man behind you?" 

Kai's step-father walked towards the door and smiled a wolfish smile. "Kai my boy why didn't you tell me that you had such a lovely step-mother.

Kai's step-mother's face softened a little at the compliment and she began to walk toward them..

Kai watched them both wearily and them remembered Keiko. His step-mother needed to go save Keiko. He tried to signal her but she was too busy smiling at his step-father and making her voice sound all weird and girly.

"And who is the dashing man in my kitchen?" she asked, "Are you one of Kai's teachers?"

"Me?" he asked laughing a little, "No. I'm Kai's step-father."

Her face paled and Kai knew that she had heard about who he was and what he had been in prison for.

"I'm here to see my little girl Keiko," he continued noticing her reaction with satisfaction.

Kai knew that he had to act now, he could hear the little patter of footsteps as his sister came down the stairs. He could not let his step-father get hold of her. He was sure that she would end up dead. He looked at his step-mother and shouted "Grab Keiko and run!"

She paused for a minute in shock that he had spoken and then turned to run grabbing Keiko off the stairs as she went..

"You little shit!" his step-father shouted backhanding him and knocking him to the floor, "look what you've done."

Kai saw that his step-father was going to chase them and grabbed his legs.

"What are you doing?" shouted his step-father trying to kick him off.

Kai held on tight and pulled himself up grabbing his step-fathers belt. All he could think of was what his father had said 'the way to control men.' Kai reached out his hand and began to rub the crotch of his step-fathers trousers.

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"You're step-mother escaped outside and called the police. You were left all alone with your step-father. Can you tell me what happened?"

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Kai screamed as he struggled on the floor.

"Oh now you don't want it whore?" his step-father asked trying to hold him still, Kai was so frantic that he kept on slipping out. He did quite like the way Kai was wiggling though.

Kai's throat was stretched and sore, he eyes were clogged with tears and still he would not give up. He'd had enough. Enough pain, enough everything! He doubled his efforts and for a moment he managed to pull himself free crawling quickly away, but not quick enough.

Kai's step-father grabbed his legs as he crawled and flipped him sideways painfully. He heard a loud crack as Kai's head collided with the kitchen counter, knocking off most of the food and cutlery on top. He inserted himself again crawling back on top of the boy.

Kai scrambled in the mess and was pushed forward at the weight of every thrust banging his head against the counter again and again. His hands were moving with a mind of their own trying to pick up anything that they would find. A dish cloth, a slice of bread…a knife.

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The police had left and it was early evening. Kai's doctor had been in four times since the police had gone and Kai was glad his shift was over. He wished that everyone had gone but he knew that his step-mother was still outside. He could hear her on the phone.

"No! that boy is not staying in my house anymore. He's cursed…No…you weren't there you didn't see what he did…self-defence? That doesn't excuse it…No. He'd a monster…We can keep Keiko but I will not have Kai in my house…Then make arrangements…Bye…I love you too."

He wondered where he was going to be living now. He was a monster who would want him?

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Kai didn't flinch as the police kicked the door down just held on to he knife tighter. His hand was beginning to ache. He would never put the knife down though. Never again.

The police Captain took in the scene shocked. He had been called and told that there had been a domestic disturbance. He had been told that they should hurry a violent ex-con was locked in a house with a child. He had not expected this.

Kai was kneeling on the floor holding a knife in front of him almost as if he was praying. He was almost completely covered in blood. His trousers and underwear were around his knee's. What had once been his step-father was now a bloody corpse. There had obviously been quite a struggle, the blood on the floor was smudged in circles and handprints.

The captain walked forward a little and nearly slipped in the blood, On all his years he'd never seen so much blood. Hadn't known that there was that much in one person. How many times had the child stabbed the man? He wondered. He could hear one of the other officers behind him turn and vomit into the sink.

"Son could you put the knife down," he asked, disappointed in how badly he was handling the whole thing. "You're safe now. It's ok." he started approaching Kai slowly holding onto the counter for balance. He felt like he was walking on an ice ring in normal shoes. The blood was slippery and sticky in places. He could smell the other officers vomit and wanted more than anything to escape into the fresh air and never breath the stench of so much blood again.

Kai could hear the voice but not the words. He hugged the knife closer to his body. He just wanted to rest but he couldn't. He knew that is he closed his eyes they would get him.

The Captain watched Kai pull the knife closer and panicked. What if the boy stabbed himself? He rushed forward slipping and skidding on his knee's. He could feel the blood on his trouser legs and on his hands. Suddenly he didn't care if the boy killed himself or not, he just wanted to get out, he would quit the force and never have to feel oozy stickiness of blood between his fingers again. He shook his head. They had trained him for this.

Kai looked up in time to see the strange man fall. he wanted to run but he couldn't move, he had used every last bit of energy trying to escape, all that he had was now concentrated on holding the knife as tightly as he could. The man came close and grabbed him. He wanted to cry when the knife was wrenched from his grip. He could hear his step-mother screaming as she entered the room. He couldn't keep his eyes open anymore.

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"Kai?"

Kai looked up to see his father walk in. He looked guilty and Kai knew that he would never see the man again. He just knew.

"Kai. Me and your step-mother have been discussing the best thing to do to you after this tragedy." He paused and sat on the edge of the bed. "We think that it is best you go away for a while. Your grandfather runs a school. He is enthusiastic that you join…they train beybladers…you like Beyblading, I know you do. He'll come and pick you up from the hospital when you are feeling a bit better and take you there."

"You aren't coming back to visit me again?" Kai asked hoping that his father would say no.

"No. I think that it is best we make a clean break. I will take good care of your sister…"

"She's not a whore." Kai said quickly remembering that she too was his mothers child.

"What?" his father asked shocked.

"She's not a whore like mum and me," Kai explained. He didn't know what a whore was really, but he knew that when he was called it bad things always happened.

"Ok." said his father wondering if Kai had gotten brain damage. He hoped not. His father had paid him allot of money to hand the boys guardianship over, he did not want to give that money back.

Kai nodded and leant back into his pillow. He wanted his father to leave now.

Kai's father stood up and looked down at his son for a moment. It would be the last time he would see him. He felt guilty about selling him…his wife was right though. The boy just seemed to be cursed. He was having another child now. He wanted the new child to have a chance.

End of Part 2 


	3. The Only Way To Win A War

Disc: I do not own…you get the idea.

Note: Thank you to all of you who reviewed. It is just nice to know that some people are actually reading this.

Chapter 3 The Only Way to Win a War

Kai noticed their silence as he walked into the room. It was hard to stop himself from smirking.

He'd defeated them all, ruined them. It was what they deserved.

He absorbed the frightened glances with well concealed glee and walked over to the far wall leaning against it cockily, closing his eyes and folding his arms.

It was good that they were afraid of him now. It was what he wanted.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kai was pushed hit by boy after boy, insulted and beaten.

"Murderer" one called.

"Boris' pet!" another added.

He was younger than all of them. Smaller than all of them. His 'grandfathers' position only made them hate him more.

"You're such a little girl," one laughed grabbing his arm. "You look like a girl, you cry like a girl…so you must be a girl."

A brown haired boy licked his lips. "A girl here? Now that would be a nice thing…"

Kai pulled his arm free and fled. He didn't want to become too angry. He scared himself when he was angry. But he wanted to be strong. Strong and perfect like Boris told him he should be.

Strong so that they would all leave him alone.

If he was stronger then maybe he wouldn't hate them all so much.

BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB

Eyes closed Kai could hear the instructors footsteps as he approached. It was the same everyday.

They would get up at the crack of dawn and train until dusk. You could eat then.

He'd noticed a few new boys when he had entered the room. He could already hear the others warning them about him. He smirked his eyes still closed.

No use learning their names. Not until they'd survived at least two months. If they could manage two months then they could probably manage two years. If they couldn't they were soft. If they were soft then they would die.

It might be the cold that got them, or the work, sometimes it was the food or lack of it that made them ill.

Most of the time it was Boris.

Boris had ways of breaking the boys, though some he favoured more than others.

Kai opened his eyes and scanned the new recruits. Five new boys and already he saw two that were Boris' type.

They looked scared and young. He'd looked like that once when he'd first arrived…

But he wouldn't allow himself to think on that too deeply.

They weren't memories that he enjoyed.

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"This is my Grandson," boomed Voltaire, his voice; strong monotone and slightly bored. "He is to be the Abbeys newest recruit."

Kai shuddered as Boris caught his gaze across the desk.

The bulky purple haired man had his chin resting on his laced fingers and an amused glint in his eye.

"Your grandson Kei? " he asked.

Voltaire shook his head. "No, Kai. Kei's dead." It was as if Voltaire was discussing the weather.

"I see. I though that was Kai. So this is the one that killed his step-father?"

Voltaire nodded for a moment looking almost proud. "Yes my son needed rid of him and gave us a good price…he probably would have paid us to take the boy away."

Kai felt Boris' eyes on him again. He didn't like the feeling. He balled his right hand into a fist remembering suddenly the feeling of power that had come from the bloody knife.

"Special treatment?" asked Boris making some notes on an already full sheet of paper.

"No no, I don't see that he has done anything to deserve that yet. Work him as hard as you do the rest of the children. Work him harder. He has more to prove then they do."

Boris raised an eyebrow. "He isn't your heir?"

"If he earns it. If not you can have him. My son already has his new wife pregnant. It would be easy enough to find a replacement of my blood."

Boris' face lit up. He could have him. He liked the sound of that. Though weedy and slightly effeminate Voltaire's grandson was still a beautiful little boy. He decided then that no matter what happened Kai would fail. He could easily have the other recruits soften him up a bit. They wouldn't take too kindly to him killing an adult, or that he was the grandson of the director. "I'll put him in group B then, in the south wing."

Voltaire nodded and turned. "Keep me posted as usual." he ordered leaving the room and the Abbey.

"Well little Kai I guess you belong to me now."

DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

The lessons were repetitive. They had been practising their launches for nearly three hours now. It was a Tuesday, they would do this for three more hours and then be allowed a five minute break before they began exercise in extreme environments.

Kai liked Fridays best. Fridays were one on one competition days.

It was fun to battle opponents and prove your superiority.

It wasn't fun too lose though. In the Abbey losing was one of the worst things you could do.

Even when you were facing the instructor.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Kai had lost. He had only been in the Abbey one week and already he was failing.

In that week he had passed out from exhaustion twice and broken a finger that the instructor had refused to set until the end of the day. He hated it and he hated Beyblading.

He hated beyblading and he had lost.

He felt the floor opening up beneath him before he saw it. A trap door set beneath them to punish the losers. He knew that where ever he ended up would not be pleasant.

When Kai woke up he realised that he was in a cell. He felt around hoping for a clue as to where he was. He was surrounded by four stone walls and could feel no way out. His heart sunk into his chest and he remembered his grandfathers words. He would get no special treatment. He could easily be replaced. After everything he'd been through, after how hard he'd had to fight…he was dead. They were going to leave him here until he was dead.

He strained too see anything in the darkness. His eyes aching and filling with white dots. He tried to blink them away.

It lasted for what felt like hours until after one final blink the dots left. He could now see a little better.

He cried when he saw that their was nothing to see. Just walls and emptiness.

He stood until he could stand no more. He sat after that. His stomach made sounds he didn't trust. He lay down after the freezing floor made his bottom numb.

It was getting colder. He had learnt that in the Abbey when it got colder it was night. He huddled in on himself to keep warm.

He was near death when they let him out.

So near death that he could taste it…it tasted good. After that whenever he was frightened he would remember that taste, like stomach acid, he would remember that it wasn't so bad and that death was probably better than this.

Kai had tried even harder after that. Every Friday he would put his heart and soul into winning. Every Friday he lost. But he was getting better. He improved a little each time…

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The day had been hard and Kai was exhausted when he made it back to his cell. Every time he got used to the physical exertion they would add another level. They didn't want the recruits to get too comfortable in their training.

Kai slammed his door and began to undress. He slept in solitary having proven himself too dangerous for the dorms.

Even tried Kai smirked at the memory. They had deserved what they had got.

GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

It was midnight when Kai stalked into his dorm blue face paint freshly removed and scarf in hand.

He passed twelve beds until he reached his own throwing his small scarf and gloves onto it has he reached for his regulation pyjamas.

He didn't hear the boys as they snuck up behind him, stealth training and low snoring covering their steps. He didn't have time to react until he felt himself be pushed face first into the mattress.

"The pretty little girl is back" one whispered licking his neck.

He could hear the others laughing quietly behind him. He tired to twist but they had pulled both of his arms up behind his back and were pressed too closely behind him for him to move his legs.

"What do you want?" he spat with hate. He didn't whisper hoping to attract guards even if it meant that he would be punished as well.

"We want what all boys want from pretty girls…" came another voice.

"I'm not a girl." Kai growled struggling slightly then going limp. There was no way he could move them using force. There was too much weight on him. "But you don't want a girl."

He could feel the bodies on him stiffen in confusion.

"Do what you want. It's a pity that you are restraining me though. I'm pretty good with my hands." Kai tried. He knew what these boys wanted. It was, it seemed, what everybody wanted from him. What everybody would always want from him.

"What?" asked one and Kai knew that his plan was working.

"Didn't Boris tell you?" mocked Kai incredulously, "I'm a whore, I love it."

Kai smirked as his hands were freed and the felt the boys remove them selves slightly.

"So who's first?" he asked turning himself towards them confidently.

Suddenly nervous a tall boy stepped forward. "Me?"

Kai nodded beckoning him closer with one hand, "Come on then." he encouraged.

The boy shuffled forward taking so long that Kai walked towards him and met him half way. The others watched obviously excited. They weren't worried even if Kai changed his mind and did fight they could easily overpower him.

Kai reached out his hand running it down the boys body until he reached the groin. It was time. Kai squeezed and the boy screamed.

The others ran to help him.

"Come any closer and your friend won't be enjoying any 'pretty girls' again."

They stopped and watched.

Kai knew he was stuck. If he let go they would get him and he had to let go some time. He couldn't stand this way for ever. He needed the guards to come. It squeezed again this time harder. The boys' scream woke the rest of the room.

The other boys panicked and rushed the scene. Kai had to let go when things escalated; hitting, scratching, pulling hair, anything to stop them from getting him.

When the guards finally arrived it had turned into a riot. Even boys who were not directly involved were covered in blood and Kai was right in the middle in his hand hair and skin from where he had just partially scalped a nearby brunette.

Boris had not been pleased. Kai had been blamed.

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Kai shivered as he pulled on his pyjama top and trousers and slipped in between the itchy woollen covers, snuggling into his flat pillow.

He shifted and turned after a few moments a spring stabbing him painfully in the hip. The whole bad creaked as he turned again trying to get comfortable.

His cell was dank and isolated. His bed was uncomfortable. His clothes were second hand; his top too tight, his trousers so baggy that he needed a belt to keep them up.

His day to day life was painful, hard and exhausting.

He was unhappy…but he would never try to run away again.

He wasn't stupid,

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Kai was exhausted. They had been running around the entire Abbey compound for two hours already in the freezing cold.

He nearly collapsed when he was lapped by one of the senior cadets. It just reminded him how far he had left to go.

"Move it kid!" called another cadet as he ran by pushing Kai forward face first into the snow.

He froze praying that no one else had seen him fall. His hopes were dashed when two other cadets ran past sniggering.

Kai choked and swore. His face was red from cold and humiliation. He was soaked and angry. He was miserable.

As he got up he noticed something on the fence. Walking over and shivering he noticed that it was some cloth hanging loosely from a break in the fence.

He rubbed his eyes causing them to sting and tear up. The hole was still there.

Quickly checking the coast was clear and pulling the coat tighter around himself he jumped through.

Once on the other side he could think of nothing to do but run.

He was going to run away. Far away, where he would never have to see the abbey, or Boris, or his grandfather, or his father and stepmother again.

His spirit and stamina renewed by his new found freedom Kai ran on as fast as he could looking for a road he recognised.

He may not have wanted to see his father or step-mother again but he had to save Keiko. He had promised that he would take care of her, he couldn't, leave her behind.

His fingers felt numb through his gloves when he finally located the right road. He wondered if they had noticed he was missing yet. It was getting dark and the snow had once again begun to fall.

The streetlights reflecting off the snow were blinding as Kai finally reached his fathers house.

He walked up the frozen stone path carefully making his way to the front room window. If he could just see Keiko then he knew he could get her to come outside.

The first thing he noticed when he reached the windows was that his lips were blue and cracked. He shook his head and stared past his reflection to see inside.

The fire place was lit and the room decorated warmly. It must have been near Christmas. In the Abbey you knew the day of the week but never the date or the months, The room was lit up and there was a large Christmas tree in the corner.

The door began to open. He held his breath and waited.

It was Keiko smiling like and angel. She was dressed in a white nightgown, she looked like she belonged on the top of the tree.

He was about to knock when someone else entered the room. It was his step mother. She held a smell baby in her arms and was smiling in a way he's never seen before. Keiko ran to her and he saw the little girls lips form the word 'Mum'.

Dizzy he stepped away from the window pain and away from the happy family inside. It was true then, he realised desperately, it was true that they were all happier without him. They had all just forgotten him when he was sent away…

He stepped backwards a few more steps a weak helpless sound leaving his mouth. He knew he should run. Get away, go somewhere, anywhere so he wouldn't be caught and brought back…but he could do nothing but back away.

He could see the shadows of the Abbey guards as they came up behind him but he had no fight left. "Take me back." he whispered. "Take me back to the Abbey."

It was a relief to feel the guards baton hit his skull.

JJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJ

Kai shot awake quickly sweaty and frightened. He'd had another nightmare and now he knew that he'd be awake all night.

He shifted forward slightly and looked through the bars on his window. The sun had not yet even begun to rise.

He turned and crawled back up his bed, his pillow was covered in blue paint.

He must have forgotten to take it off before he went to bed.

KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

He'd been back at the Abbey less than a day when he woke up. Oddly they had left him unguarded and so he decided to explore. The room was large and smelled clean, it's walls a lighter shade or grey.

The infirmary, he decided. He felt strange. Different. He'd lost everything…every thing he'd had to lose…and he felt stronger than he ever had. His head ached off course, his teeth still slightly numb from the jolt…but he felt refreshed.

It didn't matter what happened now. He had no one to protect, or impress, or please…he could be what he wanted. He wanted to be perfect. He wanted to be able to beat everybody. He wanted respect…and solitude…he wanted the power to never be forced again.

He examined the nearby tables. They held an array of strange objects, types or glue and some staples, a pot of half eaten jam, Vaseline and some blue eye shadow.

He had an idea. Picking up ingredients as he went and mixing then into the Vaseline until he had a blue paint like solution. He would paint himself. War paint, something to keep everybody at a distance…something that would stop them from seeing him as weak.

He would paint his face and hide behind it. He would use it and make them fear him.

He would paint his face and plot revenge.

End of part 3

Next part has Tala in. 


End file.
